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Week 17: At Blackhorse Lake

LISTEN to “At Blackhorse Lake” by Jonathan Johnson

This week’s story begins the third section of Chaos, Wonder, and the Spiritual Adventure of Parenting – “Embracing Life.” So it may seem odd that it’s a story about a man grappling with the death of his mother and how that shapes him as a father. The answer in a nutshell: he feels a renewed responsibility to carry on his mother’s life, and to help her life grow, in the way he parents his daughter.

This story made me think about my mother-in-law’s death in August 2020. My children were three years old when their Nana died unexpectedly. What am I carrying on that she taught me, my wife, and our children in her life? One of the greatest gifts she gave her grandchildren was attentive love. She was never distracted when she was with her grandchildren. Her focus was on them and only them, and she delighted in them (sometimes neglecting her own well-being as a result, but that’s another story!). And now, during my sabbatical this winter/spring, I will be practicing attentive love for my children in a new way. I look forward to sharing with you what I learn!

I hope this story resonates with you as it resonated with me, and helps you reflect on these questions of legacy and purpose.

After you listen, some questions for reflection…

  1. Have you ever grappled with the loss of a parent? How was your experience similar to or different from Johnson’s? How did the loss of your parent change you as a parent to your own child?
  2. Why do you think this essay about loss is in the section called “Embracing Life”?
  3. What did you learn from your parents or grandparents that you feel a great responsibility to pass along and teach to your child(ren)?

With you on the adventure,

Rev. Beth

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